Where for art thou mojo?

Okay – got to admit, I’ve lost my mojo folks and the problem with having “100% genuine” in your Insta bio means that I can’t fake it with a pretty picture and an uplifting quote!

There are a few reasons I think, although I’m really not totally sure of the root cause. Covidtimes catching up with me. Missing my job. Thinking about what I’m doing/going/where I want to be. Working hard on a couple of new projects behind the scenes but progress, when you’re starting off, is often slow. Having so many ideas but getting frustrated at being just one person with not enough time (or energy or motivation at times!) The moon. This shit weather. My cold bones can only take so much winter weather in a year. Etc. Etc.

I’m fine though. Honestly. Just more pissed off at my own, self inflicted, inertia I suppose.

So, I’ve chatted with a couple of people today, given myself a kick up the arse and set up a little office workstation rather than working in the kitchen where I very easily get distracted by house chores. Just clearing out the junk space to an office today already gave me a little burst of focused motivation so I’m hoping it lasts and I have a few more superwoman days going forwards!

What do you do to clear out a head funk?

When my confidence went AWOL

This week I lost my confidence.

If you follow my Instagram stories, you’ll already know this and I thank you so much for your kind words and messages.

I wanted to share this with you because I know that my account is full of positivity – because that is me 95% of the time. My relentlessly positive mindset is what has got me through the past year relatively unscathed. Nevertheless, the other day I turned on myself and I thought it would be good for you to see that I’m human after all!

It crept up on me very slowly during the day. I’d been putting off a task for the last few months because there was a very high chance of rejection, coupled with a very low chance of success, but I decided that I couldn’t put it off any longer and so, with that tiniest glimmer of hope, I put myself out there and on a course for a new wave of rejection anyway!

Rejection is a massive part of my job. I’m used to it. It’s like water off a duck’s back but for some reason this felt different and I was scared.

To say that the past year, like for many others, has not been the greatest of years for me work wise is a bit of an understatement! At times, it’s fair to say that my confidence has taken a few knocks and it’s made me question if I’m any good at what I’m doing after all.

And once that negative voice took over the other day, well it was game over!

But then came another day and I had a chance to change my attitude, and I did, and even when the first rejection email came though, it didn’t actually hurt at all, so there was no need to fear it after all!!

So yep, my fragile ego has taken a bit of a battering during Covidtimes but I’ll keep putting my dented, titanium coated positive pants on and keep showing up. Compared to many, in the last year, I’m still one of the lucky ones and for that I’m truly grateful.

Going grey?

‘So how come you are so pro-ageing yet you dye your hair?’ said one woman in my messages this week?

Well, as Billie repeatedly sang back in 1998, ‘because we want to!’

Maybe this lady and I have differing ideas of what positive ageing means, but for me, the most important aspect of a positive ageing experience, is letting go of judgment and other’s expectations and opinions of how you ‘should’ look, what you ‘should’ be doing and who you’re doing it with.

Therefore, if I want to dye my hair because it makes me feel better about the way I look, then where’s the problem? Am I dyeing it because society tells me that I have to? No. Am I dyeing it to look younger? No. I dye it because simply, I prefer the way I look with blonde hair when I look in the mirror.

Lockdown 1 and 3 have shown me that I am definitely not ready to embrace my badger roots and maybe I never will be? My nan dyed her hair until her 80s and my mom, who is in her late 70s, has only now, used the past year to grow out her blonde to beautiful white locks.

I follow so many #silversisters on Instagram. I love how empowered they are and I’m fascinated by women of all ages and the different ways that they choose to transition to their natural hair. I love that they’re saying ‘up yours’ to outdated views and stereotypical opinions and making their own choice. In some cases it’s giving them a confidence that they’ve never had before and changing their fashion choices. ‘Because they want to!’

There’s lies the crux of the matter. Age how you want to!

The first rule of positive ageing is to do it in your way. The way that makes you feel your best self. Not what anyone else thinks you should be doing. Especially not that person in your DMs!