Anyone for a new newsletter with a slice of cake?

Anyone want some cake?

Well now I’ve got your attention! I’ve done a thing and I want you to be part of it! There ‘may’ be cake later so keep reading! 🧁

You know how when life gives you lemons, you make lemonade? Well life gave me some really nice Instamates and I want to make the most of it!

I have therefore created a mailing list so that we can stay in touch.

1. Because I’ve heard too many stories of people losing their Instagram accounts and therefore all their connections.

2. Because I am starting up The Midlife Memo monthly newsletter where I will be curating loads of positive news, info, features and stuff and I’d love to be able to send it to you! I suppose it’s really an extension of this account but with lots of input from other wonderful people.

This is a work in progress so lots still to work on and think about but in the meantime, please do sign up to keep in touch by adding your email to the box below!

Oh and even though it’s called The Midlife Memo – it’s a really inclusive and welcoming place for all ages – younger and older. So if you like what I do on here, please do come along and join in.

Really exciting bit! If you sign up before the end of June I’ll put you in a draw for some fabulous stuff too. There may even be cake! Well there will be if any cake makers would like to send some cake to the winner! Any offers? 😂

Please do share this post to your stories and encourage your mates to join in too! Muchos luvos! 💕

Any questions or if you’d like to get involved in some way, feel free to send me a DM xx

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Back to work with a beautiful bang!

If you’ve followed me on my Instagram stories this week, you will have seen some of the behind the scenes from a job that I did for @peanut and also why I had a very disturbed night’s sleep on my first hotel stay since February ‘20! 🙉

The job was made for me in so many ways:
1. It was a totally pink set and I got to wear pink!
2. The styling by @gemmaharrisonstylist and the overall design aesthetic was so visually pleasing to my eyes.
3. I was one of four women representing women of peri / menopausal age and as you know, I am very passionate about being open and talking about this so that we, and future generations, are more informed, less worried and more understanding of the options open to us before we’re in the middle of it! I’m assuming that by now many of you have seen the @davinamccall programme on Channel 4. I don’t know about you, but I found it so refreshing to listen to someone talk so candidly about it, in the way that we often do on here, but is rarely seen in the mainstream media. I will say again that this isn’t a conversation to be had solely by middle aged women. It’s for everyone. Plus I have to agree, if men had menopause, it would definitely be sorted by 2021. 
4. I was part of a totally fabulous (and bloody beautiful!) bunch of women and crew and after a year of being a hermit, it was frankly wonderful.

I can’t wait to hopefully share some of the images with you once they come out because I think they are going to be very special.

If you did see the programme, what did you think?

Where for art thou mojo?

Okay – got to admit, I’ve lost my mojo folks and the problem with having “100% genuine” in your Insta bio means that I can’t fake it with a pretty picture and an uplifting quote!

There are a few reasons I think, although I’m really not totally sure of the root cause. Covidtimes catching up with me. Missing my job. Thinking about what I’m doing/going/where I want to be. Working hard on a couple of new projects behind the scenes but progress, when you’re starting off, is often slow. Having so many ideas but getting frustrated at being just one person with not enough time (or energy or motivation at times!) The moon. This shit weather. My cold bones can only take so much winter weather in a year. Etc. Etc.

I’m fine though. Honestly. Just more pissed off at my own, self inflicted, inertia I suppose.

So, I’ve chatted with a couple of people today, given myself a kick up the arse and set up a little office workstation rather than working in the kitchen where I very easily get distracted by house chores. Just clearing out the junk space to an office today already gave me a little burst of focused motivation so I’m hoping it lasts and I have a few more superwoman days going forwards!

What do you do to clear out a head funk?

Top Tips for positive ageing

I often talk about positive ageing but I have had a few comments about what it actually means. So this is what it means to me. 

I think that these work for everyone, whatever your age. I know that my worst phase of ageing was my late 20s heading towards 30. I absolutely dreaded it and had a bit of a ‘midlife’ crisis!

For me personally, it’s mainly about having a positive mindset as much as possible (Remember – having a positive attitude can add another seven years onto your life!) and taking control of the areas of my health and wellbeing that I can actually influence.

However, I’m sure that positive ageing means different things to each of us so I’d love to hear what it means to you in the comments below. I look forward to learning more! 

Getting to know you!

Well it seems like it has been 18 months since my last ‘getting to know me’ post so I thought that it might be about time for another! 

I don’t want to repeat myself, so I’ll post the last two from 2019 to my ‘hello’ highlight on Instagram if you want to find out more useless stuff about me!

1. I can tap dance. My favourite step is a quadruple time step!
2. I can’t sing but I love to do it so much. Loudly and badly. But I can’t tell you how I’d love to be able to do it so that it didn’t make ears bleed! Magic wand please! 
3. If I had to live in a totally dark world or a totally silent world, I would choose a dark world as I could not live without music.
4. Food is one of my greatest joys in life.
5. Change your thoughts and you’ll change your world is a quote that I live by.
6. I’m not a fan of small talk but love anyone who gets real and open.
7. I’m a water baby. I love being in it, next to it or on it.
8. I don’t like coffee but still ‘go for a coffee!’
9. I have a weird fascination with wind turbines.
10. Quite often I prefer dogs and plants over humans but when I find wonderful human beings, I think that they are bloody awesome. Luckily for me, I’ve even found some beautiful souls on here! 😘

So there you go! Learnt anything new? Any mutual feelings there? 

Happy weeks ahead. Hope the sun keeps shining for you. 

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The ‘Invisible’ Change

I was 45 years old before I started to learn about the peri menopause.⁣ Shocking!

Two years later, I’m starting to question how this is even possible? How can something that affects us all not be talked about or properly understood, even by the women that are about to enter this period of their lives?⁣

I honestly thought the menopause was just a time of hot flushes and grumpiness with some women hotter and more grumpy than others! 🙈⁣

If it wasn’t for my community on Instagram, I wouldn’t know that there are at least 34 symptoms, that it affects us all very differently and starts, (and comes and goes) at different times, but how I wish that I’d known more about it earlier in my life so that when things started happening, I didn’t question my sanity! ⁣

I’m talking about this today, because while it may make some of you feel uncomfortable, it may make others feel so much better. Understanding this time in life is key for all of us. We all know, live or work with someone going through this!⁣

One of the uncertain things that I faced is when to speak to someone about my experiences. When is the best time to get professional help? My husband said that I was too young. I’d heard too many unsympathetic stories about GP visits and I wasn’t sure what to do.⁣

Fortunately, @healthandherltd offered me an online appointment with one of their specialist GPs. I had a 30 minute session where we discussed everything that has been going on over the last couple of years and she made some recommendations for me going forwards. It was a very reassuring half hour. 

If you are interested in finding out more about your symptoms or have your questions and concerns answered then I would recommend booking an appointment via their website. They will provide you with prescription recommendations if necessary and notes for your own GP.⁣

Also, remember that @marvellousmidlife and I chatted about much of this during our #midlifeglowupchat so go to my IGTV to have a listen.⁣

Any questions, let me know below! 💕

When my confidence went AWOL

This week I lost my confidence.

If you follow my Instagram stories, you’ll already know this and I thank you so much for your kind words and messages.

I wanted to share this with you because I know that my account is full of positivity – because that is me 95% of the time. My relentlessly positive mindset is what has got me through the past year relatively unscathed. Nevertheless, the other day I turned on myself and I thought it would be good for you to see that I’m human after all!

It crept up on me very slowly during the day. I’d been putting off a task for the last few months because there was a very high chance of rejection, coupled with a very low chance of success, but I decided that I couldn’t put it off any longer and so, with that tiniest glimmer of hope, I put myself out there and on a course for a new wave of rejection anyway!

Rejection is a massive part of my job. I’m used to it. It’s like water off a duck’s back but for some reason this felt different and I was scared.

To say that the past year, like for many others, has not been the greatest of years for me work wise is a bit of an understatement! At times, it’s fair to say that my confidence has taken a few knocks and it’s made me question if I’m any good at what I’m doing after all.

And once that negative voice took over the other day, well it was game over!

But then came another day and I had a chance to change my attitude, and I did, and even when the first rejection email came though, it didn’t actually hurt at all, so there was no need to fear it after all!!

So yep, my fragile ego has taken a bit of a battering during Covidtimes but I’ll keep putting my dented, titanium coated positive pants on and keep showing up. Compared to many, in the last year, I’m still one of the lucky ones and for that I’m truly grateful.

Going grey?

‘So how come you are so pro-ageing yet you dye your hair?’ said one woman in my messages this week?

Well, as Billie repeatedly sang back in 1998, ‘because we want to!’

Maybe this lady and I have differing ideas of what positive ageing means, but for me, the most important aspect of a positive ageing experience, is letting go of judgment and other’s expectations and opinions of how you ‘should’ look, what you ‘should’ be doing and who you’re doing it with.

Therefore, if I want to dye my hair because it makes me feel better about the way I look, then where’s the problem? Am I dyeing it because society tells me that I have to? No. Am I dyeing it to look younger? No. I dye it because simply, I prefer the way I look with blonde hair when I look in the mirror.

Lockdown 1 and 3 have shown me that I am definitely not ready to embrace my badger roots and maybe I never will be? My nan dyed her hair until her 80s and my mom, who is in her late 70s, has only now, used the past year to grow out her blonde to beautiful white locks.

I follow so many #silversisters on Instagram. I love how empowered they are and I’m fascinated by women of all ages and the different ways that they choose to transition to their natural hair. I love that they’re saying ‘up yours’ to outdated views and stereotypical opinions and making their own choice. In some cases it’s giving them a confidence that they’ve never had before and changing their fashion choices. ‘Because they want to!’

There’s lies the crux of the matter. Age how you want to!

The first rule of positive ageing is to do it in your way. The way that makes you feel your best self. Not what anyone else thinks you should be doing. Especially not that person in your DMs!

Beauty that comes with age

Today I am more than happy to add my voice to @studio10makeup’s movement to change the negative narrative on ageing. It’s something that many of you know that I’m already passionate about. 

We grow up in a society where ageing is something to dread and then endure. No one ever seems to share or focus on all the positive and wonderful things that come with age. And the ageing role models that we have available to us in the media can be counted on two hands. 

It’s one of the main reasons that I love my Insta community as much as I do. It’s such a positive place to hang out. We are absolutely challenging society’s stereotypes of what we should look like and what we should be doing. 

And yes, there is some shit stuff that happens too but we’re open and we’re talking about it. We’re learning all the time, we’re changing and adapting and I’m definitely laughing in the face of some of the crap, because it’s what I do! 

I’ve also posted a little video (on the Instagram post) that I made back in 2019 when I was already sick to death of being the target and focus of a barrage of ‘anti ageing’ and ‘recapture your youth’ advertising. (Newsflash: there are no age defying miracles and I’m more youthful now than I ever was in my 20s!) I have absolutely nothing against young people, (I made one of my own!) I just don’t want to see them modelling clothes and products aimed at me. (If you can be bothered to go & find it, I even wrote a blog post about it back in 2016!!!! Have things changed much since then? Yes, but not significantly) 

So if you feel passionately about this message too then please get posting. 
All the background info is on Grace’s @studio10makeup profile. 

Trends on repeat

How do you feel when a trend that you’ve already worn and lived through is back again, possibly even for the third or fourth time?! 🙈

Frankly I can’t bloody believe that I am going to be seen in a tank top AGAIN, especially with the bottom of my shirt poking out!

There are certain fashions that I never thought I’d see again and tank tops are definitely one of them. Yet here I am!

One fashion trend that does appear (thankfully) to have been left in the 80s are checked jeans. See me sporting those babies back in the day! Because fashionistas, even if you start wearing them in these squares, there’s absolutely no way that I am going back to that. No! No way! Never!

What fashion trend do you vow never to go back to?